Domestic violence is a more pervasive peril than one might think. The National Domestic Violence Hotline reports that nearly half of all men and women have experienced psychological aggression by their partner during their lifetime, and 29 percent of women and 10 percent of men have been victims of physical domestic abuse by their partner.
Getting out of a dangerous domestic abuse situation is imperative, though not easy. It causes stress, worry, and physical risk to even the most methodical person. In order to exit a dangerous relationship, make sure that you have considered and planned all aspects of the move strategically. Whether or not the threat of physical violence is present, plan your exit as though it is a separation to be carried out with the utmost care and protective secrecy.
Use the following considerations and resources to help you strategize the ins and outs of your transition out of an abusive home. Make sure that you have a plan and that during the development of your exit strategy, you take necessary measures to ensure that your abusive partner does not learn of the move. Even partners that have not been physically violent may turn to physical measures, attempting to force you to stay if they learn you are hiding the intent to empower yourself by leaving. Others may use emotional and mental manipulation tactics to threaten or convince you to stay.
1-800-572-SAFE (1-800-572-7233)
1-800-799-7233.
Their counselors are trained to inform you about what domestic violence is and how to safely and strategically exit an abusive situation. This strategy includes step-by-step actions to take, documents to gather, and allies with whom to be in contact before, during, and after the move. Domestic violence hotline counselors can provide you with the following information, among other resources:
Only document – in pictures, for example – on devices that your partner cannot find and do not document if there is any possibility of your being caught. Do not put yourself at risk of discovery to get this evidence. This information would simply be used to build a case against your abuser, and it is not worth risking your physical safety to obtain it.
Do not tell your children outright that you are planning for you all to leave the house. It is neither safe nor responsible to burden your children with this kind of a secret. Instead, make sure they are ready for an emergency by practicing their full name and address if they are young, and ensuring that children of all ages know what to do in the case of an emergency – where to go, who to call. Privately review emergency procedures with them.
Carefully, contact a family law attorney to file a restraining order in order to protect the safety and privacy rights of your family after the move.
At Peter J. Bronzino Law Firm, our team of family law attorneys are skilled in serving our clients in Brick, Spring Lake, Asbury Park, and all of Eastern New Jersey. in all domestic abuse matters.
To schedule a confidential consultation with an experienced member of our firm today regarding your transition out of an abusive home, please contact us online or through our Brick offices at (732) 812-3102.
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